CJ’s suicide attempt

CJ’s suicide attempt is recalled as both a life-threatening crisis and the source of lasting kidney damage. Its consequences surface years later in a conversation about organ donation, where CJ explains why she would not accept another transplant and notes that her mother has made the attempt a story told to others.

The Attempt and Its Physical Cost

At twenty-five, CJ attempted suicide by drinking antifreeze, an act she says destroyed her kidneys. The attempt remains present in her life not only as a past crisis but as a physical consequence that enters a later discussion of whether she should receive another kidney.

The Transplant Decision

When Fran asks about the possibility of a transplant, CJ explains that she could not justify taking an organ while others were waiting. She points to children born with conditions that require transplants and says she had already received one. Her refusal is therefore framed as a considered decision about the scarcity of organs and who might receive them, rather than as indifference to her own condition. CJ laughs at Fran’s response and indicates that she has already examined the decision at length.

Family Disclosure and Aftermath

CJ says her mother, Gloria, delights in telling people that CJ drank antifreeze. She also reports that Gloria had been in assisted care for the previous three years, where, according to CJ, the people there had been persuaded that CJ was the spawn of the devil. The account places the attempt in a family context in which its private and medical consequences have also become a story Gloria shares with others.