Readify

The Cost of Loving Dora as an Ideal

David Copperfield

David’s romantic idealization lets him adore Dora while overlooking the practical and emotional mismatch that marriage will reveal.

increasingupBearing stren­gth in each eventdowndecreasing
A Fairy in the Drawing RoomA Fairy in the Drawing Room from "David Copperfield". A Fairy in the Drawing Room Desire creates an ideal David sees Dora once and believes his destiny is settled.
A Fairy in the Drawing Room Desire creates an ideal David sees Dora once and believes his destiny is settled. He imagines her as a being outside ordinary life, while paying little attention to what she wants or can do. The narrator later treats the feeling with humour and tenderness. Its purity does not make it realistic.
The Romance of SecrecyThe Romance of Secrecy from "David Copperfield". The Romance of Secrecy Love lived in moments David and Dora use clandestine meetings and letters to make their love feel separate from ordinary pressures.
The Romance of Secrecy Love lived in moments David and Dora use clandestine meetings and letters to make their love feel separate from ordinary pressures. Julia Mills encourages their romantic interpretation of events. Because the relationship is hidden, David has little chance to understand Dora’s needs or discuss their future with her family.
The Proposal to Improve DoraThe Proposal to Improve Dora from "David Copperfield". The Proposal to Improve Dora Good intentions cause pain David asks Dora to learn housekeeping and accounts so their future will be more secure.
The Proposal to Improve Dora Good intentions cause pain David asks Dora to learn housekeeping and accounts so their future will be more secure. He believes practical preparation is loving and necessary. Dora hears his seriousness as rejection of her natural self and fears she is a disappointment. His language makes a practical concern feel like a judgment of her worth.
The Child-Wife’s PleaThe Child-Wife’s Plea from "David Copperfield". The Child-Wife’s Plea Acceptance before reform Dora asks David to remember her as his child-wife when her limitations frustrate him.
The Child-Wife’s Plea Acceptance before reform Dora asks David to remember her as his child-wife when her limitations frustrate him. She wants tenderness without continual lessons in how to become a different person. David’s response changes: he stops trying to remake her and accepts that some burdens must be his. The choice makes their imperfect household gentler.
Understanding After LossUnderstanding After Loss from "David Copperfield". Understanding After Loss What the marriage could not become David recognizes that Dora’s youth and inexperience limited their partnership, though neither of…
Understanding After Loss What the marriage could not become David recognizes that Dora’s youth and inexperience limited their partnership, though neither of them loved less sincerely. He acknowledges that a different match might have suited them better. This understanding does not erase the love he felt. It transforms idealization into compassion and gives him a more disciplined view of marriage.
At David’s first meeting with Dora
During David and Dora’s engagement
After Betsey loses her fortune
During the early years of marriage
After Dora’s death