Niclas

Niclas, The Narrator’s partner and Erik’s father, is shown chiefly through the intimate work of caring for a young child and making room for The Narrator’s return to writing. His attentiveness is practical as well as emotional: he visits Erik in neonatal care, studies photographs of him, worries about the prospect of daycare, and stays beside The Narrator during a later hospital night. Their relationship is affectionate, but parenthood forces them to negotiate time, work, and the shape of their life together.

At Erik’s Birth

Erik was born seven hours after The Narrator received an epidural. He weighed two kilos and one hundred grams, and doctors kept him in the neonatal unit rather than returning him immediately to his mother. The Narrator could not move freely because the anesthetic still affected her, so Niclas was able to visit the baby twice and take photographs. His role in those first hours was to carry news and images between them while they remained physically separated.

Niclas returned excited and somewhat anxious, repeating that Erik was the largest baby in the unit. He enlarged the photographs to examine their details, trying to take in the child he had only briefly seen. The Narrator was exhausted and asked him to leave her in peace, though her inability to sleep and her repeated attention to the mark Erik had left on her chest show that her own attention remained fixed on him. Niclas’s persistent reassurance thus meets her worry without quite relieving it: he has photographs and updates to offer, while she is still waiting to hold their son again.

Negotiating Parenthood and Work

After several months in which The Narrator’s identity as a mother seemed to displace her other selves, a literary prize gave her a possible route back to writing. She waited a couple of days before telling Niclas she intended to take parental leave, wanting him to understand the decision as considered rather than impulsive. They celebrated the prize, worth eighteen thousand euros before tax, and she chose the baby’s bath time, a relaxed moment for the three of them, to explain her plan.

The decision concerned the practical return to work as much as the money. February 1 marked the end of her maternity leave, accumulated nursing hours, and annual vacation; Erik would otherwise have started daycare at six months. Niclas, who was also troubled by the prospect of sending him so young, welcomed the possibility of extending parental care. He had privately considered taking leave himself, but thought The Narrator might benefit from returning to work after months of maternal isolation. She stopped that alternative at once: she would take the leave in order to write, while Erik would still begin daycare in February. Niclas’s initial reaction was visible unease, but he did not contest her choice.

Shared Plans and the Writing Project

The couple’s later holiday plans also required a balance between family needs and The Narrator’s work. She found an inexpensive hotel after searching during daycare hours, choosing a family-friendly option despite poor reviews and its position several streets back from the beach. The trip had a private purpose for her: she wanted to visit Léa, a meeting she believed would help her book. She did not lead with that reason when she presented the plan to Niclas, instead emphasizing a week by the Mediterranean, a pleasant holiday for Erik, and familiar adult pleasures. She mentioned Léa only after the booking was made.

Niclas accepted the arrangement, which included a four-hour drive and one night away, and the two negotiated a reciprocal break: he could spend a weekend in the mountains and stay out overnight in September. The episode shows them making room for separate needs through practical bargaining rather than treating either parent’s time as automatically available. On the eve of the day of Saint Ignatius, the three set off by car; Erik handled the journey better than expected and slept in the car, while both parents rested briefly on the way.

Niclas also becomes part of the process by which The Narrator tests her developing account of Alice Espanet’s case. After Erik falls asleep, she uses him as a sounding board, trying out ideas and pressing against his benevolent, innocent outlook. When she asks what he thinks of Alice, he judges that Alice is ill. His answer is a small but revealing instance of their different positions in the project: The Narrator is immersed in the case and its competing explanations, while Niclas offers a direct response without sharing the same investment in her writing.

Care During Erik’s Illness

When Erik later underwent a lumbar puncture, The Narrator found the procedure difficult to witness and had to look away. Niclas embraced her. The test confirmed viral meningitis; the doctors did not consider it serious in principle, but Erik remained in hospital overnight because his fever was still high. Niclas and The Narrator sat on opposite sides of his cot in uncomfortable chairs and did not sleep. They spoke quietly to make the night easier, pausing when Erik coughed and resuming when he settled back to sleep.

Niclas told The Narrator that they were doing well. Her reply turned reassurance into a promise to do better from then on, an answer that also exposes her tendency to make herself responsible for the fears and risks surrounding their child. In this scene Niclas does not offer a solution or claim that the danger has vanished; he stays with her, shares the vigil, and gives voice to the possibility that they are managing together.

Character and Narrative Role

Niclas is characterized through acts of accompaniment: carrying photographs from the neonatal unit, considering parental leave, negotiating time away, listening to The Narrator think through her book, and holding her during Erik’s medical care. These gestures do not make him a simple source of reassurance. His repeated insistence that Erik was the largest baby in the unit could not remove The Narrator’s anxiety, and his own proposed leave was not the arrangement she wanted. Their partnership is instead shown as a process of adjustment, with affection and care expressed through conversation, compromise, and shared responsibility.

His narrative importance lies partly in the contrast between his relative distance from The Narrator’s investigation and his closeness to the daily demands of family life. He can give a plain judgment about Alice, but he also helps make the conditions for The Narrator’s writing possible, even when her project requires travel and a rearrangement of care. At the hospital, that practical partnership becomes physical presence: while their son sleeps between them, Niclas and The Narrator keep watch together.