“Being afraid is so lame”

“Being afraid is so lame” is a self-directed refrain Bret Ellis repeats as he follows Robert Mallory from Buckley to Century Towers. The phrase tries to recast fear as weakness, but its repetition exposes how much Bret is managing dread rather than escaping it: surveillance becomes a routine, and the routine gives his fear a new object and direction.

The Phrase in Context

After following Robert to Century Towers, Bret considers lingering in Century City or seeing a film, but rejects both because they do not fit the schedule he has made for himself. Weekday afternoons and evenings are reserved for homework, planning, swimming, and sleeping; he tells himself this regimen will keep “the useless dread” from returning in his dreams. The maxim “Being afraid is so lame” belongs to that effort at self-management, not to a moment of demonstrated fearlessness.

Repetition and Escalation

Bret repeats the phrase immediately, adding that he is not a coward. The added insistence makes the self-talk sound less like settled confidence than a correction he must keep supplying. Its language dismisses fear socially, as embarrassing or weak, while the surrounding scene shows Bret keyed up enough to abandon ordinary diversions and cling to a strict schedule.

Following as a New Routine

The next afternoon Bret again drives his mother’s Jaguar from Stansbury after Robert, keeping two or three cars behind along the same route to Century Towers. Robert enters the building without appearing to notice the sea-foam-green Jaguar. Bret recognizes that he is becoming addicted to the pursuit, and that the possibility of remaining unseen excites him. The phrase thus sits beside a revealing reversal: the attempt to contain dread through discipline gives way to the charged pleasure of surveillance. Its bravado does not end the fear; it helps Bret convert fear into a repeated practice.