Conversion therapy

Conversion therapy is the coercive effort to change Colton Davidson’s sexual orientation, carried out at a camp his parents sent him to after discovering he was gay. The novel presents it not as a legitimate treatment but as an institution of punishment and control, whose effects persist in Colton’s physical scars, trauma, disrupted family ties, and later efforts to secure education and housing.

Identity and Background

Colton describes himself as having grown up Mormon and as always knowing he was different from the rest of his family. After he was discovered, his parents sent him to a camp run by Father Benson, a Catholic priest. The camp’s religious language framed gay people as morally corrupted and in need of salvation, turning Colton’s sexual orientation into the supposed problem its program claimed to address.

The distinction between the family’s stated concern and the camp’s actual methods is central to the concept’s place in the story. The camp did not offer care or a route to reconciliation; it subjected Colton to coercion under the claim that he could be made not gay. His later uncertainty about whether his family would still want him reflects how that claim damaged his sense of belonging as well as his safety.

The Camp’s Methods and Colton’s Escape

Colton is taken to the camp after being left alone in his room with the electricity cut off and nearly everything removed. He spends three days in a van, with only a mattress and a Bible among the few things left to him, uncertain about what will happen next. The arrival makes clear that this is a controlled environment intended for people like him, described by its operators as needing a chance at salvation.

The abuse continues over a period Colton cannot measure precisely. He is kept in the dark, deprived of food and strength, and repeatedly subjected to tests intended to assess his reactions to images the staff presumed would provoke desire. The narrative emphasizes the gap between the camp’s stated aim and its practice: when its methods do not produce the response its operators seek, the coercion continues rather than ending.

At one point, Father Benson calls Colton a problem child and says little can be done to help him. The remark reduces Colton to an obstacle in the camp’s program, even as his experience shows that the harm comes from the program itself. Years later, Colton cannot explain exactly why he ran; he remembers knowing that he had to get across the fence, because remaining in the camp’s basement, pit, or box offered no future he could endure. Escape marks a decisive break from the institution’s control, though not an immediate end to its consequences.

Aftermath and Disclosure

After leaving the camp, Colton has visible marks that gradually heal, alongside scars he does not want to revisit. Years later, he tells Amit that he had been sent to a conversion camp after his parents realized he was gay. He struggles to describe what happened, pausing as his voice and breathing falter, but explains that the camp’s purpose was to make him not gay. His disclosure identifies the abuse as an attempt to change his orientation rather than an ordinary foster-care placement.

The account also clarifies why Colton’s relationship with the foster system is complicated. He was sent away by his parents, not taken from them after they legally lost custody. When financial aid is denied, the rules treat him as dependent on his parents’ income despite his time in foster care. His camp experience therefore remains connected to later institutional barriers: the original family decision helps shape a formal classification that limits his access to education funding.

Lasting Consequences and Significance

The camp’s consequences recur in Colton’s adult life through trauma, economic insecurity, and the continuing difficulty of explaining what happened. His birthday at eighteen carries a separate but related threat: Ted House will no longer be home, and he faces leaving its support just as he has no reliable family safety net. The pressure to become independent is not evidence that the camp has made him stronger; it exposes how little protection the surrounding systems provide after abuse.

The story links this history to Colton’s later self-doubt and to the practical obstacles he encounters while trying to build a life. He worries about the age difference between himself and Marcel, his nervousness, and his work at a café, while financial-aid rules threaten his plans for veterinary education. These circumstances do not establish that every later hardship is caused by the camp, but they show how the camp’s damage sits within a wider pattern of constrained choices and precarious support.

Conversion therapy functions in the novel as both a specific episode of abuse and a lasting rupture in Colton’s relationship with his family, faith, and sense of safety. Its religious framing supplies the camp with a language of supposed correction, while Colton’s escape and eventual disclosure expose the violence concealed by that claim. The narrative’s emphasis falls not on a change in Colton’s identity, but on the harm inflicted by the attempt to change it.