Madame Teastane's Female Seminary

Madame Teastane's Female Seminary is a school for upper-class girls located in the fashionable Goldhaven district of the Emerald City, adjacent to the Lady's Mystique theatre. On Lurlinemas Eve, its students inadvertently thwarted Elphaba's assassination attempt against Madame Morrible by spilling into the street at the critical moment, forcing the would-be killer to abandon her mission rather than harm innocent children.

Location and Setting

Madame Teastane's Female Seminary stood next to the Lady's Mystique, a small bluestone theatre in Goldhaven, one of the Emerald City's wealthiest neighborhoods. The school catered to the daughters of the elite—"small creamy lumps of uncurdled femininity" from families of tycoons, despots, and butcher generals. On the evening of Lurlinemas Eve, the seminary was holding a school occasion that released its students into the square just as the holiday oratorio audience was gathering.

The Disruption of the Assassination Plot

Elphaba had positioned herself on the steps of an ancient wool market in the square, her hand working beneath her cloak as she prepared to kill Madame Morrible, who was arriving at the theatre on the arm of a tiktok minion. Just as the Head of Crage Hall walked past the seminary, the front doors of Madame Teastane's Female Seminary were thrown open. A swarm of six- and seven-year-old girls burst out, laughing and singing, chasing a pantomime player dressed as the Fairy Preenella who carried a basket of trinkets. The children formed "a small unruly mob" around Madame Morrible, leaping up at the actor and grabbing for presents. Elphaba's face showed "wildly surprised" disbelief as the children got in the way of whatever she was supposed to do. She struggled with herself, her hands fighting with each other, trying to decide whether to proceed anyway or to stop. Madame Morrible pushed on through the crowd and passed safely into the theatre. Elphaba crumpled against a pillar, "shivering with self-loathing so violently" that Fiyero could see it from fifty yards away.

Consequences and Aftermath

The presence of the schoolgirls—"noisy, innocent daughters of tycoons, despots, and butcher generals"—created an accidental context that Elphaba could not override. She had spent five years working toward this assassination, but the children's presence made her abort the mission. After the crowd filed into the theatre and the children shrieked their song in the street, Elphaba managed to lose Fiyero, who had been stalking her. She fled to her hideout above the corn exchange, where she was ambushed by the Gale Force. The attack left Fiyero beaten and bloody, and Elphaba escaped to take refuge at the Cloister of Saint Glinda, beginning her seven-year retreat from the world. The failure at Madame Teastane's Female Seminary marked the collapse of her first major campaign against the Wizard's regime and sent her into a period of profound guilt and self-imposed exile.